We JUSTIFY our behavior to no end and we RATIONALIZE our decisions in a way that makes us feel safe. We continue to watch the shows and just imagine what their lives are like without having to really take stock of our own. These shows distract us from dealing with our own shit. Continue reading Addict: Abuser or Devotee?
These last few days have been like waves…they roll in and roll out. One minute I am feeling great and going strong then the next I am feeling terrible and feeling weak. It is somewhat unpredictable but somewhat predictable…everything feels … Continue reading DAYS 9,10 &11: Waves
Today I was so busy I did not do a lot of thinking about food! Ahhhhh….that felt nice! I am still hungry a lot and I still get starvation pains but those only come when I really have not eaten … Continue reading DAY 8: Not so much about food!
I am understanding that my addiction is not a source of shame. It is apart of me now and has been for a LONG time and there is no changing that. How I interact with the addiction will change. But to do so I also have to make it human…I have to make it a tangible part of me. I have to acknowledge it, talk to it, interact with it, keep it public and open. Continue reading DAY 7: RESULTS! (This is a pretty epic post…you for SURE want to read it)
It feels like this week has dragged on but then it feels like it has flown by. It has been a week of contradictions…I think that is the best way I can describe it. Continue reading DAY SIX: The Day Before…Round 2!
Weight loss is NOT a physical challenge. It’s a MENTAL one. Continue reading DAY FIVE: Bored and Exhausted!!!
“Why am I doing this again? Why am I not eating __________ or drinking __________? Who am I? What day is it? Where am I? Are those GUMMY BEARS? FMLFMLFMLFMLFML” Continue reading DAY THREE: Resistance is still possible…but it sucks and I don’t want to do it anymore!
McGraw-Hill defines a confused sea as “A highly disturbed water surface without a single, well-defined direction of wave travel.” Craig Smith describes it in his book “Extreme Waves” as a sense that something has changed. “When you are on a … Continue reading DAY FOUR: Confused Seas
Being full has nothing to do with being hungry. It’s infuriating really…you know you are full…you know you have all the nutrients you need for your day…but your body or your brain just will not let you be ok with that. THE STRUGGLE IS REAL! Continue reading DAY ONE! I AM the master of the universe!
There HAS to be something wrong…there just has to be. I am active…I eat good…I don’t sit around round all day…but what if I DO the super hard work of just committing to a drastic program or shift and my health issue are STILL there? What if I lose a bunch of weight and I still have shit wrong? What if I try to lose a bunch of weight and I don’t? It will be my FIRST failure…people will know I failed… Continue reading FAIL
Thee Struggle is REAL! 