Tag: Fear

30/10 Weight Loss for Life, Weight Loss2 Comments

Day 83: Results!

awesomeapril

Despite the off plan foods and the drinky-poos from the weekend before and the lack of sleep and general poor attitude towards life Tuesday-today I managed to still get rid of some poundage. It was a HORRIBLE food week…I mean REALLY bad. But s my 30/10 coach helped me understand today…even with the bad food I am still eating less. I am making better decisions when I am not eating the bad food and I am thinking about why I am doing it. All victories in the larger struggle. Continue reading Day 83: Results!

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Day 82: Another Day Before

awesomeapril

My addiction is still pulling strong on my new ways and nothing feels right. Even though I REMEMBER not being happy in the old ways it did feel normal. And the whole goal of addiction is to help you feel nothing. Why would I want to return to that? To feel “normal”. Continue reading Day 82: Another Day Before

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Days 80, 81: SO OVER THIS!

awesomeapril

I ordered a new Seahawks sip up sweatshirt jacket thing in an XXL and it does NOT fit. I can zip it up but its one of those items you would NEVER wear in public. Do I keep in of hopes of fitting into by the time the Hawks play in the Suerbowl? Do I send it back with an angry note about making clothes that FUCKING FIT people and not only the Seagals? FML dude…FML! Continue reading Days 80, 81: SO OVER THIS!

30/10 Weight Loss for Life, Failure, Fear, Weight Loss1 Comment

Day 74: It SUCKS Again!

awesomeapril

One small thing leads to another then another then pretty soon you are sneaking into a convenience store for Hi-Chews and paying for them in cash….untraceable because you have also ditched your wrappers in someone else’s garbage can. Then Hi-Chews lead to Starbucks which leads to murder. Well maybe not that extreme but it leads down a dark path of food that kills you. Continue reading Day 74: It SUCKS Again!

30/10 Weight Loss for Life, Motivation, Weight Loss2 Comments

Days 62-Oh who the hell knows…

awesomeapril

I went to Alaska for all that and was able to experience ALL of it. Sure my struggle was there with me the whole time. But my brain but that on the back burner because it knows that even struggles take vacations…we all need vacation to remind us of the good life. To remind us why we work so hard and struggle so much…to live the good life and live it WELL. Continue reading Days 62-Oh who the hell knows…

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Days 60, 61: Hungry in Hoonah

awesomeapril

There will be no more big time distractions over the next few days. We will be 100% on board and mom has planned our meals to be on plan. We are having lunch out I think tomorrow but that will be the last of it until Sitka. I have not been as good with my water recently and I will get back on track with that tomorrow too. Just time to get back on track with everything and make the indulgences few and far between. Continue reading Days 60, 61: Hungry in Hoonah

30/10 Weight Loss for Life, Fear, Weight Loss2 Comments

Day 54: The 7th Day Before

awesomeapril

My very first thought was that is was my old ways…my old habits…my nothing thinking leaving my body…Not all of it…but a big enough piece to make some space. I then had a moment of fear-what was going to fill this space now? Something bad…something not healthy…something I don’t want? Holy shit…that space BETTER get filled with something good. Continue reading Day 54: The 7th Day Before

30/10 Weight Loss for Life, Motivation, Weight Loss10 Comments

Day 49-53: Hungry Again…

awesomeapril

How fortunate that we live in a place where we can do that…seek simplicity and find joy in music…friends…and some beer. It was another great moment of normalcy for me. That felt like my old life but it was not my old life. My old life would have been a not so healthy meal and way more drinks than 4. I would have still noticed the trees and the setting sun but those things we a bit sweeter because I was appreciating everything as a big package. I was full…I was satisfied. There was nothing in that moment of time that I wanted and food was nowhere in my brains orbit of thought. What a cool feeling. I would like to feel that way often if not all the time. Continue reading Day 49-53: Hungry Again…