“Instead of seeing hunger as a negative thing, see it as a positive thing, Instead of dwelling on hunger, contemplate its opposite: fullness. Purna, or purnata, he explained, is both fullness in eating, and also the idea of perfection, wholeness, the entire universe complete unto itself, you wholly and fully yourself.” Continue reading Thoughts on Finding “Full”
How fortunate that we live in a place where we can do that…seek simplicity and find joy in music…friends…and some beer. It was another great moment of normalcy for me. That felt like my old life but it was not my old life. My old life would have been a not so healthy meal and way more drinks than 4. I would have still noticed the trees and the setting sun but those things we a bit sweeter because I was appreciating everything as a big package. I was full…I was satisfied. There was nothing in that moment of time that I wanted and food was nowhere in my brains orbit of thought. What a cool feeling. I would like to feel that way often if not all the time. Continue reading Day 49-53: Hungry Again…
I am changing how I interact with people and food, I am changing my perfection of obesity and this struggle globally, I am learning to focus on me and my needs, I am learning how to “do me” around others, and I am learning how to set boundaries for myself and others along this journey. Continue reading Day 48: On the Road
I spoiled them with my time today and that felt really good. I spent as little time as I could in the kitchen and put all my extra time into being with them swimming and boating. I think that is more meaningful and memorable than any treat I could give them. You don’t remember the treat, you remember the day. Continue reading Day 47: Good Times
I was able to eat or drink something that I was really wanting without going overboard. I never wanted more of anything because for the first time in a long time I was satisfied with my choice- it had either done the trick and filled some empty food void or had proven a point to myself…that some of the things I used to enjoy are just no longer enjoyable. How else do you know how far you have come without testing those limits? Continue reading Days 37-46: Circle the Wagons!
It is really quite infuriating. You come up with a plan…spend countless days arranging everything so your road blocks are minimal…you rally your support network, hire the professionals to help guide you, you set your realistic and timely goal…you do everything that you are supposed to do. You work your ASS off every moment of every day, you make sacrifices and your struggle and you claw your way to that goal. And then you REACH it…you have MET your goal. But instead of a rush of adrenaline and happy thoughts you reach Mount Anticlimactic. Continue reading Day 35: Why Can’t I be Happy With a Loss?
It is hard to hear that this was the best week with such a small loss. I feel very conditioned to only think and concern myself with my weight number. Even though 30/10 really only focuses on your visceral fat loss and your total body fat composition, the weight number is the easiest to understand. I cant see my actual fat but I can see what I look like. The less I weight the better I will look…right? Continue reading Day 34: Mixed Results
I still do not know how I will maintain my future weight and that is making me nervous and anxious. I am also not a wheel-spinner and I feel a bit like I am spinning my wheels. I know there are some BIG changes coming in my personal life but these changes are still on the horizon. I just want the weight to be gone so I can get on with things. My therapist would-I am sure- suggest that this is tactic that my addiction is using to try to get me off program or off plan. I will see him Thursday and see if I am correct in my assumption. Regardless…that is how I am feeling today. That is what I am thinking at this very moment. Who would have thunk that there was so much involved with being fat/overweight/obese! Continue reading Day 32: Restless
t WORKS if you just let it work. Don’t OVER-DINK (Dad) with it and just let it do its thing…just go with the flow! So these next couple of days I will go with the flow. I will follow the program to the letter and just let it do its thing. Continue reading Day 31: Going With the Flow
Celebrations, sun, Standing Head to Knee pose, and Rice Cream Pie. Continue reading Day 30: Father’s Day
Thee Struggle is REAL! 