I can tell that things are changing because my clothes are fitting differently and I noticed today that I just take up less space on my yoga mat. My arms and legs can move in directions that they just could not before. My body might not ever look the way that I want it to and I have to be ok with that. Like releasing weight…I have to take it one goal at a time. Continue reading Days 103, 104: Back to School!
The struggle today was no match for my..well..my day. I has SHIT TO DO and was busy doing that. I also finished my book The Martian by Andy Weir and when I am reading I have NO TIME for the struggle. It was a great, on-plan day. No real cravings…no real issues. I think making all those lists helped. It lessened my anxiety about a lot of things and cleared up some pictures that had been covered in dust. Maybe that is something to add to “Thee One Who Struggles Knows This For Sure” list…that lists help lessen the struggle. Continue reading Day 86: More Lists
I went to Alaska for all that and was able to experience ALL of it. Sure my struggle was there with me the whole time. But my brain but that on the back burner because it knows that even struggles take vacations…we all need vacation to remind us of the good life. To remind us why we work so hard and struggle so much…to live the good life and live it WELL. Continue reading Days 62-Oh who the hell knows…
“Instead of seeing hunger as a negative thing, see it as a positive thing, Instead of dwelling on hunger, contemplate its opposite: fullness. Purna, or purnata, he explained, is both fullness in eating, and also the idea of perfection, wholeness, the entire universe complete unto itself, you wholly and fully yourself.” Continue reading Thoughts on Finding “Full”
How fortunate that we live in a place where we can do that…seek simplicity and find joy in music…friends…and some beer. It was another great moment of normalcy for me. That felt like my old life but it was not my old life. My old life would have been a not so healthy meal and way more drinks than 4. I would have still noticed the trees and the setting sun but those things we a bit sweeter because I was appreciating everything as a big package. I was full…I was satisfied. There was nothing in that moment of time that I wanted and food was nowhere in my brains orbit of thought. What a cool feeling. I would like to feel that way often if not all the time. Continue reading Day 49-53: Hungry Again…
I am changing how I interact with people and food, I am changing my perfection of obesity and this struggle globally, I am learning to focus on me and my needs, I am learning how to “do me” around others, and I am learning how to set boundaries for myself and others along this journey. Continue reading Day 48: On the Road
It is really quite infuriating. You come up with a plan…spend countless days arranging everything so your road blocks are minimal…you rally your support network, hire the professionals to help guide you, you set your realistic and timely goal…you do everything that you are supposed to do. You work your ASS off every moment of every day, you make sacrifices and your struggle and you claw your way to that goal. And then you REACH it…you have MET your goal. But instead of a rush of adrenaline and happy thoughts you reach Mount Anticlimactic. Continue reading Day 35: Why Can’t I be Happy With a Loss?
Learning is a passion of mine. Reading is another passion. The two go hand in hand…no matter why you are reading or what you are reading you are learning something. Continue reading Food for Thought
My goal is to lose 5 pounds by June 25th. I am .7 pounds away from achieving that goal. That feels pretty good. It does NOT however make the pst week any more bearable. It does in a small way…but like I told my mom this morning…I would rather lose less weight each week and have my mental state be more positive. Continue reading Day 28: Results!
f I can understand my beliefs I can control my emotions and my emotions responses. And the more even keel I can become the less I will feel the need and urge to take control of uncontrollable situations through eating. Well…this is the theory at least! Continue reading DAY 14: SUCCESS!
Thee Struggle is REAL! 