I am NOT religious. Some of my family members are spiritual and it’s not like I have not been exposed to the worlds organized religions…they have just never made sense to me. The few times I have been in a Christian church have been for weddings and for tours- Europe has some AMAZING cathedrals and churches. My family is however RELIGIOUS about celebrations…any excuse to celebrate and gather we take FULL advantage of. For example; my mom used to host a Cinco de Mayo dinner. Our family tree has no branches outside of white and European but MAN she makes some mean tacos. So to celebrate Easter and what appears to be the arrival of spring in the Northwest Grady, my sister, and I hosted our families for Easter “linner” (lunch/dinner)…all 17 of us! Grady smoked hams on the Tragger smoker, Maria whipped up potatoes, a broccoli salad, and some KILLER deviled eggs, and we rounded off the whole feast with some fruit and a bean salad. Grady then treated us all to dessert Salted Carmel Carrot Cake and a Lemon and Honey Pine Nut Tart that was to DIE FOR. Maria and I made our sugar cookies to just throw the whole thing over the top. Maria and I were commenting on how Easter in our family has turned into a flower exchange and how happy we are for this new tradition! The day went off without a hitch and everyone departed with stuffed stomachs and a smile on their face!

When the day was over I realized the only thing I posted on social media were pictures of the food- well I did post one picture of some beautiful tulips. Before I would have never noticed this but this year I did. Just another reminder that the struggle is still real and I have some issues with food. But instead of dwelling on this discovery I thought of all of the awesome non-food related things that happened on Easter. I came up with a pretty good list!

• Grady and I were able to entertain both of our families on the same day at the same location! WOOHOOO!
• Maria and I had a ton of fun hosting the party and making our cookies.

• I got to deep clean parts of my house that have not seen the light of day since last spring.
• I debuted a new dress that is one size smaller than the last time I wore a dress 🙂

• Grady was able to showcase his growing baking talents!
• I was able to watch my almost 5-year-old nephew enjoy and play with his new toys.
• Hosting here meant I had to get some spring flowers planted and Grady had to do some pressure washing= pretty look house inside and out 🙂
• I got to use my Lenox British Colonial dishes and new GOLD flatware! (Service for 16 really DOES come in handy)
• I was showered with tulips, which are my favorite spring flower!

• I didn’t OVEREAT. I ate and enjoyed but stopped when I was full.

Now its Tuesday and some of that food is still lingering in my home. Last night after our “delicious” dinner salad (insert eye roll here) Grady and I each had a small piece of his carrot cake then threw the rest out. I shed a tear as I watched that delicious cream cheese frosting melt into the garbage disposal. Tis time to get back on plan. The past two weeks we enjoyed and celebrated a bit too much. Well…not too much I guess. We just lived out lives and our lives are non stop travel and celebrations. So yeah…we lived our lives and ate some food that makes you fat. Last weekend we were up north in Mount Vernon for a tulip garden tour and a birthday celebration then Easter so it is time to get back at it. I have been doing well these past few weeks; two weeks ago I was down 4 pounds and last Thursday I was down 0.5 pounds. I will take anything that is lower than the week before. I am hoping for more down this Thursday 🙂

I am still striving to be intentional with my time and dedicating the time I have to things during those times. Multi-tasking is bad. You never do any of the things well. Sure you might get them done but would you remember doing them? Did you produce something of quality? No cell phone during a meal has been tough but we have turned off the TV on some nights and just listened to music while we ate and that is a nice break for the usual eat on the couch in front of the TV routine we find ourselves in constantly. With the weather improving and the sun shinning I am hoping to eat more meals around our fire outside. I have done almost every day of Oprah and Deepak’s 21 Day Meditation Challenge and am really finding it interesting. Throughout my day the centering thought from the session will pop into my head at random times and taking the break in the day to meditate I feel has helped me stay calmer than usual. Last week I was able to do something I have never been able to do while practicing yoga- Camel Pose! Got both my hands to touch the back of my legs. The teacher suggested just propping up my feet and seeing what would happen and holy shit I could touch them. Took me 5 years to get there but it was such an awesome feeling having accomplished the beginnings of that pose. Progress. My intention is progress.

I am still taking the meditation class at the studio and our last session we talked a lot about impermanence. Nothing in our lives or the world is permanent. The sooner we understand and accept that the less suffering we will have to endure. I put that to the test in yoga this week. In forward knee to head pose I almost always get a major cramp in my gut about halfway through the pose. So this time when the cramp came I said to my self- “this cramp will pass…it too is impermanent” in my most sarcastic voice in my head I could muster. I took deep breaths in and”directed” my breath to the cramp to try to loosen its grip on my inners. Sure enough…the cramp passed and I was able to stay in the pose for the entire duration of it. FLOORED. I think my meditation teacher is on to something…

I am really trying to become more and more “OK” with not loosing 100 pounds in a year. I am feeling better about it with each week and every day I am trying to find peace with that. My intention is to continue to lose weight…continue to release it back to the wild and never look back at it. It’s hard to do when I catch myself in a mirror somewhere unhappy at what I am seeing or trying on clothes and never being happy with the way they look or the size. Its going to take some time. I have to keep reminding myself that my current weight will not always be my weight. It too…like everything else is impermanent.